Irken Odyssey
by SpyroForLife
Summary: Invader Tenn has been captured by the Meekrob and all of the Invaders including Zim must go rescue her and conquer the planet. They succeed and Zim returns to Earth. However, he encounters trouble along the way... Somewhat ZaDRish. Heavily inspired, obviously, by Homer's The Odyssey.
1. Emergency Transmission

Emergency Transmission

Zim held up a poorly constructed model of the Empire State building so GIR could see, and then shoved it into a vat of boiling chocolate. He let it sink and exclaimed, "Is it not ingenious?"

GIR seemed fascinated. "You're sooo smart, Master!"

"Heh-heh, I sure am." Zim picked up a clipboard and made some notes.

GIR started fishing around in the chocolate for the building. Finding it, he happily yanked it out and licked the chocolate off.

Zim looked up from his notes and just sighed at GIR. "Maybe when I'm done with that I can try, once again, to figure out what on Irk's wrong with you."

"I like chocolate," GIR said, taking a big bite out of the building. He dipped it into the chocolate again.

"…Just don't make a mess." Zim returned to writing.

Suddenly, he heard the sound of static from a nearby monitor. He turned to look at it.

"Eh?"

A disjointed voice started coming through, sounding vaguely familiar. "Please help! …Horrible- Can't fight… Pl- Mee-" The transmission faded for a moment before whoever it was managed to continue. "Send rein- Planet …Krob, Inv- Tenn, out- AHH!"

It cut to static and then ended rather suddenly.

Zim stared blankly at the screen. "What the hell? Computer, trace the origin of that call."

"Call came from the Planet Meekrob, sent from Invader Tenn's base. However, apparently she needs help and is being overrun," Computer replied.

Zim thought about that. "I see… Well, she'll be fine." He looked over at GIR and saw that he had finished off the model and was now drinking the chocolate. "GIR! What're you- ah… forget it." He stalked off to another part of the lab to work more on his ingenious plan.

GIR looked at him sadly before grinning. "Aw, you look mad, Master! I'll cheer ya up!" He tackled him, hugging him tightly.

Zim dropped his wrench and then howled in pain as the heavy tool landed on his foot. He jumped up and down holding his foot, swearing in irken, before grabbing GIR and yanking him off his back. "GIR, what'd I tell you about trying to hug me when I'm working?"

GIR thought hard about that one. A few sparks actually flew from his head. Then he beamed and said, "To not to!" He looked pleased with himself.

Zim pinched his forehead between his eyes as he felt the beginning of a migraine. "Then why did you?"

"Cause I love you, Master!"

Zim sighed and put GIR on the floor before returning to his work.

GIR ran over to the vat of chocolate, which was still boiling, and dove in, somehow managing to submerge completely.

The lights in the lab suddenly flashed red.

Zim immediately looked up at the communication screen.

"Incoming transmission from the Massive," Computer reported.

"Put them through!" Zim shouted, wiping oil off of his gloves with a rag and running over to stand in front of the screen. The Tallest appeared and he saluted. "Sirs!" He was ecstatic. It was rare for them to actually call him. Usually he has to call them.

"Yeah, hi," Red said. From his tone of voice, it was obvious he wasn't thrilled about talking to Zim. He looked at the mess of chocolate behind the small Invader and the cluttered work table. "Been keeping busy?"

"Very busy, sir! See, I've been working on-"

Purple held up a hand, cutting him off. "Yeah, that's great, but we don't care. We have something more important for you to do."

"What is it?"

"A few minutes ago we got pieces of a transmission from Planet Meekrob," Red replied. "Invader Tenn's base has been completely destroyed and the Meekrob have captured her. We're sending all the Invaders in as emergency reinforcements to defeat them once and for all and get her back."

"So pack up and leave by tomorrow," Purple concluded.

"Tomorrow?" Zim exclaimed. He looked around. "But I've been here for a year! I'm so close! Surely you don't need…"

"We need _everyone_ Zim, even you. Besides, you've done nothing but complain about that place the entire time. You shouldn't be too upset about leaving. And once you're done on Meekrob, you can go back," Red sad.

"Well… I suppose you're right. Okay, my Tallest. Where do I rendezvous?"

"We'll be organizing the Invaders and giving them weapons at these coordinates," Red replied, sending the information to Zim's computer. Zim had it programmed into his cruiser.

"Okay. Anything else?"

"Yeah," Purple said. He took a deep breath, and then said, "We need every last soldier we can get, so get here quickly."

Zim grinned and bounced slightly in excitement. "Oh, of course! I'll get there as soon as possible, my Tallest! You can count on me!" He saluted. They nodded and ended the transmission.

Still smiling, Zim started cleaning up around the lab, putting anything dangerous away so GIR couldn't get to it.

"Where are you going?" GIR asked, following him to the Voot Cruiser's hanger.

"I have to go to Planet Meekrob."

"Can I come?"

"No, GIR. You have to stay here and watch the base so none of the _filthy_ human pigs get their hands on it."

"But I want to come with you!" GIR hugged him desperately.

Zim fought to push him away before giving up. "GIR, listen to me," he said in the kindest voice he could manage. "It will be dangerous. You're too immature to handle the dangers of war and I don't want you getting hurt."

GIR stared up at him with wide eyes before slowly nodding and letting go of him.

Zim patted his head and opened the hatch of the Voot Cruiser.

"Can't you stay for a while longer?" GIR asked. "The tall guys said you didn't have to leave until tomorrow."

"They need me now, GIR. The war won't wait."

"But I'll miss you."

"…I'll miss you too, GIR. But they need me there a lot more than here right now." He double-checked the coordinates and made sure the Voot was in good condition. "It's very important for you to guard the base. This is the most important thing I can ask you to do. Can you do it for me?"

GIR nodded. "I'll guard the base, Master! I'll be the best guard ever!"

"Good." Zim climbed into the pilot's seat of the cruiser. As he reached to start it, he remembered something. "Oh, right. I suppose I should tell him I'm leaving…"

"Tell who you're leaving?" GIR asked.

"The Dib." Zim got out and went to the house level of the base, GIR following close behind. It was nighttime; Zim wasn't going to bother with his disguise.

"But you don't like Dib. Why would you tell him?"

Zim paused to consider that. Why was he telling his enemy where he was going? "Simple. I don't want him to think I'm gone forever and get his hopes up. I want him to know I'll be back to crush his planet once and for all."

He stepped out into the night, leaving GIR behind. The robot went to sit on the couch and wait. Then, getting bored, he turned on the TV.

Zim slipped carefully from street to street, avoiding streetlamps, always moving in the shadows. He soon found Dib's house and used his spiderlegs to scale the wall up to his bedroom window. He pushed it up and slipped in, landing on Dib's bed. The springs creaked and Zim tensed up, but Dib was sitting at his computer totally immersed in a video about vampire hamsters, so he didn't notice.

Zim slowly crept up behind him and stood up.

Dib frowned as the reflection of something green and red appeared on his screen. He paused the video and turned around. "AHH!"

Zim quickly clapped his hand over his mouth before his yelling could wake up Gaz. "Silence," he hissed.

Dib writhed to get free of him, but since Zim was stronger, he couldn't break free. After several moments, he stopped.

Zim let go of his mouth and said, "I have a reason for coming here, so you pay attention."

"What do you want?" Dib crossed his arms and waited. He still found Zim as annoying as ever.

"I'm leaving."

Dib uncrossed his arms and stared in shock. "Leaving? Why?"

"I have to go help out another Invader. But why do you care anyway?"

"I don't care! Go ahead and leave! Good riddance!" Dib felt strange about that news, though. Sure, he's tried to get Zim to leave for about a year… but now that the irken was actually going, he was starting to feel a little miserable.

"I won't be gone forever, Earth-stink, so don't get used to it. I'll be back in a month at most, ready to finish what I started here." Satisfied that he had said what he needed to say, he turned to go.

Dib grabbed his wrist. "Wait!"

Zim glared at him. "You dare stop the almighty ZIM from leaving?"

Dib was surprised by his own boldness. He didn't let go, though. "You'll come back, right?" He didn't know why he was so upset by Zim leaving Earth. He had grown used to him and even liked being able to fight him. It helped convince him that he wasn't crazy, that his life had purpose. And he was closer to Zim than anyone else, even his own family.

Zim relaxed a little. Was that all the human was worried about? "Yes, I'll come back."

"You promise?"

Zim stared at him. Why did he care so much? "Yes, I promise."

Dib let go of him.

"Why do you care?" Zim asked. "You've been trying to drive me away this entire time. You should be happy."

Dib struggled to explain. "I… I don't know. I just like having you around. You're proof of everything I've been trying to tell people. You're my proof that I'm not crazy. And if you leave… well, then how will I know if you ever were real and weren't just some dream?" His voice raised in pitch as he got worked up.

Zim started to get worried and took a step back. "I'll be back!" he assured him.

"Okay, you better. I still have to put you on an autopsy table," Dib said, trying to calm down and smile. It looked strained, though, as though someone had put a gun to his head and demanded he smile or else.

"Well, I think I should get going. They really need me on Meekrob." Zim turned again to go, but Dib put a hand on his shoulder.

"Wait, I want to give you something to remember me by." Dib pulled him around to face him and briefly touched their lips together.

Zim jolted in surprise. What was the stink-beast_ doing_? His hands were on him and his mouth… ugh!

But the human's grip was surprisingly strong and his touch was cautious but firm.

Zim realized this felt strangely… right. He liked the closeness of the other. Slowly, he leaned in to kiss him back.

They broke apart after a second. Dib blushed and looked away.

Zim touched his fingers to his lips. They were still burning. "Why did you do that?" he asked, curious but not as angry as he usually would be.

"I… uh…" Dib nervously patted his legs, looking anywhere but Zim's face. "I don't know. Just… Oh my God, I can't believe I did that."

"I can't believe it either. What's the matter, Dib? Are you gonna miss me when I'm gone?"

Dib shook his head, then rethought it and nodded. "Yeah, a little. It's going to be too quiet without you screaming about victory all the time."

"Well, don't worry. I'll soon be back and you'll soon get to see me again." He smirked.

Dib nodded, slowly meeting Zim's eyes. "Yeah. Come back soon."

Zim climbed up onto Dib's bed and then onto the windowsill. "I still don't get why you care so much, but I'll defeat the Meekrob and get back as soon as possible, don't you worry, Dib-stink."

"Bye."

After several moments, Zim sighed and said, "Bye," back, leaping down and disappearing into the night.

Dib sighed and sat down at his computer again. He touched his mouth where he had kissed Zim, wondering why he had done that. It made his departure seem very final, but he believed him when he said he'll be back. After all, he wouldn't leave this planet behind so easily.

He shut his computer down and went to crawl into bed. Vampire hamsters could wait until tomorrow. Right now, he needed to think about this.


	2. Battle

Battle

"You are our most important soldiers," Red said as he hovered back and forth in front of several rows of Invaders and regular foot soldiers. Zim was standing proudly in the very front, next to Skoodge. He's been here for about a day now and they were still doing preparations, but he could tell already that they were gonna hit hard.

"You'll be in the first line. First to go into battle. The first strike against Meekrob!" Red shouted.

Everyone cheered.

"Now, do you have your weapons?" Purple yelled.

Everyone pumped their guns in the air.

"Are you ready to fight for Irk?" Purple went on.

They nodded, holding their guns up higher, putting their fists in the air.

"Then let's get out there!" Purple screamed.

They quickly rushed to their cruisers.

"Zim, I'm not good at fighting!" Skoodge yelled, running next to the eager Zim.

"You conquered Blorch in a few weeks, Skoodge! You'll be fine!" Zim replied. He jumped into his cruiser and started it up. Skoodge got into the one next to him and cast him a worried glance. Zim gave him the thumbs-up.

They were going to be flying in formation, using their ships' lasers to gun down whatever the first defenses were going to be around the capital city of the planet. Once they were weakened, they would land their ships and get out to fight on foot. In hand to hand combat, irken against Meekrob, the irkens were stronger.

"Wow, look at them go," Purple commented as the hanger door opened into the airlock and all the cruisers darted in. The door closed behind them. The Tallest changed the camera view to the airlock so they could watch as the outer door opened.

"They have no clue what's in store," Red replied, shaking his head. He grabbed a speaker and shouted. "Okay, first line, get ready. On my signal… GO!"

The ships tore out of the airlock.

Red turned off the speaker and laughed. "They're going to get slaughtered."

"Yeah. Did they really think we were going to send in our best soldiers against those guys? We'll let them exhaust their ammo on them so that when the real soldiers get there, they'll be defenseless and easily cut down."

"Are we bad people?" Red asked, his voice sincere.

They looked at each other for a few moments before busting out laughing, doubling over and clutching their stomachs.

Once they managed to calm down, Purple sighed happily and said, "Let's watch the carnage."

Meanwhile, the formation of cruisers was steadily approaching Meekrob. Instantly, the automatic orbital defense platforms keyed in on them and started firing lasers. Several ships were destroyed instantly. Zim nearly got hit, but he spun his ship to the side just in time.

Several terrified calls came through to him. He had been made fleet captain, so naturally, they wanted his help.

"Just pay attention!" he shouted. "As soon as you see a platform ready to fire, begin evasive maneuvers until the danger has passed! Everyone that has a clear shot, destroy the platforms!"

There was a scream of fear from Skoodge. Zim turned to look as a nearby cruiser did a barrel roll, a laser missing it by feet. While it was still rolling, a powerful laser shot from it and obliterated the nearest defense platform.

"Great job, Skoodge!" Zim shouted.

"Thanks, sir!" Skoodge called back, sounding surprised that he had actually hit it.

A familiar custom ship, sleek and red, rushed past and destroyed another platform.

"Great job, Tak!" Zim said.

"Whatever," she replied. She was still mad at him for ruining her plan a few months ago, but she had put that aside for the better good of Irk, building a new ship just like her old one.

Zim spun his ship around to avoid a laser and checked to see how many of his fleet was left. About half of his original number. "Okay, quick, down to the surface! They won't fire once we're within a certain distance of the planet!"

There was a scream of pain and then nothing.

"LARB!" Zim shouted in horror. Seeing only the wreckage of a ship spiraling away, he lowered his head and growled. These Meekrobs would pay. "Quick, everyone!"

Everyone broke away from their battle with the defense platforms and raced with Zim down toward the surface. They lost a few more ships on the way, but eventually, the platforms stopped firing, not risking hitting the surface.

"Who have we lost?" he panted.

Several tired, sorrowful voices came back to him and told him. He felt a pang as the names of Invaders he had grown up with reached him. Larb, Stink, Flobee… and many others.

"We'll honor their memories," he said. "We'll teach these Meekrobs a lesson they'll never forget."

Everyone shouted agreements.

Zim looked ahead to the surface. "Okay, they will obviously have ground defenses. We'll need to take them out. Watch yourselves, watch each other." A human saying suddenly came to him, and without thinking, he shouted it. "Dulce et decorum est pro patria mori!"

"What does that mean, sir?" Skoodge asked.

Feeling mildly embarrassed, Zim replied, "It's a saying I learned on Earth. It translates to, 'It is sweet and fitting to die for one's country.' A country is essentially an empire. SO LET'S GET OUT THERE AND FIGHT!" With a cry that would make a kamikaze pilot proud, he plunged toward the surface with the rest of his fleet behind him.

Red and Purple watched in surprise. They hadn't expected them to get so far. They had lost a good many of their number, but still Zim led them on. That little irken would do anything for his empire, wouldn't he?

"I thought he'd be the first to die," Purple commented, digging through his tray of nachos.

"Me too. Hmm. Oh well, they won't last long. The ground defenses are even better than the orbital ones," Red replied, helping himself to some nachos too.

Zim was first to reach the surface, after destroying several of the large cannons around the city.

He leapt out of his cruiser, gun in hand, snarling. Skoodge landed next to him and ran over, saluting him and hefting his gun, looking around nervously.

"Let's go," Zim said. "We're the first line. We're going to clear the way so the rest of the soldiers can get into the city, take it, and rescue Tenn."

"The Meekrobs are coming," Skoodge shouted, pointing.

Sure enough, a large, organized group of the floating blue aliens were drifting toward them, taking their time, quite confident they could drive away the irkens.

Tak landed nearby and ran over. She slapped her gun impatiently against her hand. "Come on, you filthy aliens," she said. "Just try to defeat us."

One by one, the rest of the fleet touched down behind them and got out, forming a waiting wall, guns out and trained on the approaching enemies.

"They say the waiting is worst then the battle itself," Skoodge said quietly.

As the Meekrob got closer, they were able to see that they were holding several powerful hand held weapons that crackled with energy.

"No, I think the battling will be worse," Zim replied, but he was still confident. He's gotten this far already. Getting tired of waiting, he shouted, "CHARGE!" He ran forward.

After a brief hesitation, everyone else rushed after him, shouting war cries in irken. The Meekrob sped up too, aiming at them.

The two sides crashed together. In the close combat, Zim didn't have much room to shoot and instead resorted to smashing their faces with the butt of his gun, knocking many unconscious. They fell out of the air as they were knocked out and were soon trampled by the rushing irkens.

Zim elevated himself on his spiderlegs and started using the points as knives, slicing through the creatures and spilling their translucent blue blood.

"Don't let them fool you!" he shouted to Skoodge, who was being backed down by one that had transformed into a ghostly Hogulus. "It's just an illusion!"

Skoodge nodded and closed his eyes, shoving his gun into its face and firing a laser through it. It screeched and exploded.

He turned back to the battle and found himself face to face with one. He backed away, but before he could get his spiderleg poised, it spoke to him in a gentle, wise voice. "I see the pain in your heart. You have left someone behind and wish to return to them. Who is this that you long for, irken?"

"I long for you to die!" Zim replied, stabbing the spiderleg forward. The Meekrob dodged it and surveyed him, reading his thoughts, as all of its kind can do.

Then it transformed, becoming a boy a little taller than Zim, with a long black trench coat, black hair, and amber eyes behind large glasses. The boy watched Zim closely, and when he spoke, he used Dib's voice. "What's the matter, Zim? Can't kill me?" he taunted.

"I know you're not Dib!" Zim shouted. "I don't miss him!"

"But you do. You do miss me. You long to feel my touch again." The illusion drew closer, hands reaching to touch Zim's face.

Zim leapt back with a hiss and stabbed it through the heart. It faded and revealed the alien, twitching around the metal appendage, before growing still. Zim scraped it off and couldn't help thinking of Dib, wondering how the human was doing. Has he exposed his base somehow by now? GIR wasn't always trustworthy with matters of security.

"Zim, watch yourself!" a voice shouted.

Zim looked up just as Tak leapt in front of him, shooting a Meekrob that had been heading for him.

"This is no time for daydreaming!" Tak was holding one of her arms awkwardly against her chest; it looked like it had been broken. But her expression was quite devoid of pain.

"Eh? Oh, right. Thanks." He nodded gratefully and leapt back into the battle. They were quite outnumbered, and many of them had been killed, but they kept fighting. Zim was relieved that his old friend Skoodge was still fighting. Then again, that guy always had been unkillable.

"When is the next line getting here?" Tak demanded about ten minutes later, looking up at the sky for a moment before she had to kick a Meekrob away and shoot it.

"I don't know," Zim replied. He had lost his gun by now and was fighting hand to hand with a Meekrob. He clawed it fiercely and then slammed his elbow into its face, knocking it back and distracting it enough that another soldier could run over and finish it off. They nodded to each other. Then the other rushed off and Zim said to Tak, "Maybe they're waiting for us to finish off these defenses and then come help us take the city."

"Well they better get here, because they just keep coming."

They had to stop talking as the Meekrob doubled their efforts, many transforming to fight. Zim was still a bit disturbed by the one that had turned into Dib, but no more have copied that trick and he was slowly getting over it.

Eventually, they were left with only twenty soldiers, and the Meekrob kept coming. Everyone was tired and barely moving in time to block attacks. Several were injured.

Zim backed away and took his communicator out. "Contacting the Massive, come in."

"Yes, Zim?" Purple replied.

"We're losing out here. Send in the next line of fighters. Repeat: Send in the next line!" he shouted desperately. Then he screamed and ducked as a particularly vicious Meekrob lunged for him. He stabbed it several times with a spiderleg until it stopped moving. "We're down to twenty- ah, Slacks!" He almost cried. "Make it nineteen."

Red's voice came onto the line. "You know what; we're just going to wait until they're done slaughtering you. No point sending in new soldiers while you all are still going."

"Wait, what?"

"We don't like any of you short Invaders anyway. Most of you have done your job and given us plenty of new planets; you're sacrificial."

"You sent us in as sacrifices?" Zim shouted. "To clear the way so the tall soldiers could easily finish them off?"

"Yes, that's exactly it," Purple replied. "Glad you figured that out."

"That's horrible!"

"Yeah, but what are you going to do about it? Have fun dying, Zim."

The call ended.

"My Tallest, wai- My Tallest?" Zim heard only a buzz. "DAMN IT!"

"Are they sending anyone?" Tak asked.

"No, they sent us in as sacrifices to tire out the Meekrob and their defenses so the 'real soldiers' can come in, finish them off, and get all the honor."

"What?" Tak demanded. "I can't believe they would stoop to that level!"

"Well I'm not going to let myself be killed. There must be a way." Zim tried to think. Raw strength wasn't going to win this one. They were far too outnumbered. Then he remembered an old war he learned about at the human Skool. One side was at a severe disadvantage… until one of its soldiers, the king of their empire, decided to use his brain instead of his brawn to fight. An idea suddenly came to him, crystal clear. "I have a plan."


	3. Back on Earth

Back on Earth

Dib looked over at the desk where Zim usually sits, half-expecting him to walk through the door. Class started and he sighed, looking over at the teacher, Mrs. Sour, a rather stern lady that never took any crap from her students. Compared to Ms. Bitters, however, she was just one big ball of sunshine.

"Okay students, go to chapter three of your science book!" she shouted.

"But we haven't even started chapter two," Zita said.

Mrs. Sour glared at her.

"But chapter three sounds interesting!" Zita said quickly, opening her book and hiding behind it.

Dib gave up on waiting for Zim. Either he really was gone, or he was just staying home to work on some new evil plan. He thought back to last night and tried not to blush. He didn't know what had come over him. He should be happy that Zim would be leaving him alone for a few weeks or however long he'll be gone.

He slowly touched his lips as he thought of the way Zim's mouth had felt when he kissed him yesterday. He was still embarrassed that he had done that, but what was even stranger was that Zim had seemed to enjoy it before quickly pulling away, bidding him goodbye, and leaving.

He rested his chin on his desk. Zim would be back. He was indestructible and cruel. If anyone could survive a war, it was him.

Until he returned, he'd devote his time to something else. Perhaps he could prove that his neighbors were vampires. Or maybe he could catch that zombie squirrel that's been terrorizing the park. Something to get his mind off of Zim's absence.

Mrs. Sour paused in her lecture to look around. "Something's not right…" she muttered.

Everyone thought about that one.

Then Chunk said, "It's too quiet."

"Where's Zim?" Mrs. Sour asked.

Instantly, everyone looked at Dib.

He held his hands up innocently. "He left," he said quickly, not wanting to be blamed for anything. "He said he'd be back soon."

"Well he better have a good excuse for missing class," Mrs. Sour said, returning to her lecture.

"He'll be back," Dib said quietly, to himself. He focused on the teacher again, but his thoughts kept returning to Zim. He really hoped he was all right.


	4. Trojan Sleria

Trojan Sleria

After calling a retreat, Zim and the survivors moved to a flat plain about a mile from the city. The Meekrob went back into their city, waiting for the next strike.

"So what's your brilliant plan, Zim?" Tak asked.

"Hold on." Zim finished bandaging someone's arm and then said, "Okay, while on Earth, I learned about a past war, which came to be known as the Trojan War. The winners started out much like us. They were outnumbered and completely at a disadvantage in an unfamiliar land. So this king, Odysseus, decides to use brain instead of brawn."

"Get to the point," Tak snapped.

"So they build a giant wooden horse and- Yes, Skoodge?"

"What's a horse, sir?" Skoodge asked.

Zim sighed. "It's an Earth animal. It was the symbol of the city, or whatever. Anyway, the army builds a giant wooden horse and gives it to Troy (that's the name of the city) as a peace offering and then set sail, leaving the city behind. The people of Troy rolled the horse into the center of the city and celebrated their victory, partying and drinking and so on. But as it turned out, there were soldiers hidden inside the horse. They waited until it was night, then snuck out and opened the gates. The rest of the army came back and attacked the city while everyone was asleep or drunk. The army won Troy. And the horse became known throughout history as the Trojan Horse."

Everyone was silent for a while, pondering that. Then Tak said, "Wow, for humans, that's pretty smart."

"So do you think we could copy such a trick?" Skoodge asked.

Zim nodded. "Oh, I think we can. Once we have control of the city, we'll control the rest of the world."

"Where are we going to get the supplies, though?" Sneaky-On-Foota asked.

"Yeah, and we're gonna need the other soldiers to back us up," Spleen added.

"Okay, I'll call the Tallest and tell them of the plan. As for supplies, there are trees over there we can use." Zim took out his communicator. He wasn't looking forward to talking to them, now that he knew what they had tried to do, but he had no choice. "My Tallest, please come in."

"Yes, Zim?" Red replied after several seconds.

"We have a plan to take the city but we need your approval."

"…Tell me this plan, then."

Zim explained it to him, stressing how they would need every last soldier to storm the city once they opened its gates and shut down its defense grid.

"Please, sirs, it's fool-proof, and so much better than the original plan," Zim concluded.

There was a long moment as the two talked it over, arguing a bit, before relenting and agreeing.

"We need to rescue Tenn and take control of the planet as soon as possible," Red said. "And your plan is much quicker than the original one. I can't believe I'm saying this, but… good job, Zim."

"Thank you."

"When do you plan on getting your 'Trojan horse' into the city?"

"Tonight."

"I'll tell the soldiers to prepare. Just give us the signal when the city's defenseless."

"Yes, sirs. Thank you."

The transmission ended and Zim turned to the rest of his troop. "The rest of the soldiers will be ready to assist us."

Everyone nodded and looked relieved, but the mood was too subdued for them to cheer.

"Anyone who isn't too badly injured, follow me to the trees. We need wood." Zim led the way. About fifteen others followed.

"What are we going to build, though?" Skoodge asked. "I don't think they have horses on this planet."

"Good point. Does anyone know what kinds of animals live here?" Zim asked.

"We should make a Sleria," Tak said.

"What's that?"

She sighed. "Didn't you do any research about this place?"

"No, that's Tenn's job!"

"Well, a Sleria is a large bird with bright blue feathers and a distinct white aura that surrounds it wherever it goes. It sometimes lights the way for lost travelers. It has religious symbolism and some of their best stories and poems are written about it. It's a terrible crime to harm one, and if one is found injured, it must be taken care of unless there's absolutely no hope for it, in which case it is put down humanely and given a proper burial."

Zim stared at her. "Wow, that's amazing."

She shrugged. "I did my homework before coming here."

"So, a big blue bird," Zim said, putting his hand on the trunk of the nearest tree and testing its strength. "I don't think we'll need to paint it. If we do this well enough, they'll know what it is."

"Very well. Who here is good at construction?" Tak asked.

A few hesitantly raised their hands.

"Who is good at drawing?" she continued, holding up her own hand. About three did too. "Okay, everyone who's good at drawing, help me design the structure. Construction team, I'll need your help to determine the size of the wood pieces and how everything is going to fit together in the end."

"And everyone else, help me cut some of these trees down," Zim ordered.

They got to work. About an hour later, they began the actual construction. The others that had stayed with the cruisers came over too after a while, having recovered enough to handle the labor.

Working together, they managed to finish a ten foot tall wooden sculpture of an elegant bird spreading its wings wide, its long feathers stretching out.

"This is very nice," Zim said, running a hand over it to test it. Then he ducked underneath it to check the hidden door on the bottom. It would be impossible to distinguish unless one knew exactly where to look for it. He pulled the door off and looked inside. "There's enough room in here for ten of us. I'll be inside. Who wants to come with me?"

Tak and Skoodge volunteered. So did Spleen and Sneaky-on-Foota. When they finally got ten people, they started going over plans to shut the city's defenses down once they were inside. The nine that weren't going in would push the bird to the gates and give it to the Meekrob with a sincere plea for them to accept it as their surrender, in return for Tenn. If they don't get her… they'll attack. If they get her back, they'll take her back to the Massive for whatever medical care she might need while the soldiers attack the city at night anyway. Either way, the planet would be theirs by morning.

"We have to push it a long way, so we should start now," Zim said. "Come on, everyone." He climbed into the structure and moved to the back so the rest could get in.

"I hope this works," Skoodge said.

"It will work," Zim assured him.

They closed the hatch. After a while, the structure started moving forward. They talked more to relieve boredom, arguing occasionally but getting along relatively well nonetheless. When they ran out of things to talk about regarding the attack, they talked about the planets they had invaded instead.

"Those rat people were freaky," Skoodge said. "But they were pretty nice once you got to know them. I was almost sad to see them get destroyed."

"Ah well, their planet's been serving us well as a parking structure planet," Tak said with a shrug that was lost in the dark.

"Zim, how's Earth?" Skoodge asked, giving Zim a slap on the shoulder.

"Earth? Oh, it's horrible! The water there is like acid! And it falls from the sky! Sometimes it's frozen and sometimes it's liquid… and sometimes it just hangs around the ground in thick clouds." He shuddered. "The people are so stupid and ugly, living on oblivious to anything outside of their planet. Not even the smartest man on the planet is aware that I'm there. I go to Skool with his son for crying out loud!"

"You mean Dib?" Tak asked.

Zim nodded. "Yeah, Dib! Oh, don't even get me started on that boy! He constantly gets in my way, ruining my plans, dumping water on me… he just…. UGH!"

"Does he know what you are?" Skoodge asked.

"Yes," Zim replied. "He's smarter than his fellow humans. He's smarter, more well-groomed… and I think he's a worthy enemy."

"Sounds like you like him," Tak teased.

"I don't like him," Zim replied, crossing his arms. "Stupid filth pig."

"Did you tell him you were leaving?"

"Yeah, I did." Zim closed his eyes and his memories replayed that moment when Dib had kissed him, telling him it was something to remember him by. He made him promise to come back… once again, he wondered why the boy cared so much. "He insisted that I come back once I was done fighting here. I don't know why. I think he's grown obsessed with me. Everyone else thinks he's crazy and can't see me for what I truly am. But he does. He's convinced that if he manages to capture me, the world will see that he was telling the truth and treat him like a hero."

"So he told you to come back…. and you just left?" Tak asked.

Zim nodded, not wanting to tell them about the kiss. "I just left. That's all there is to it."

"Are you sure?" Skoodge said. "I've known you for a long time and I can tell when there's something bothering you."

"No, there's nothing bothering me."

"Okay, but when you're ready to tell me, I'm right here next to you." Skoodge patted him on the shoulder.

Zim scowled and scooted to sit closer to Tak, talking to her instead.

Eventually, the team of irkens pushing the Trojan Sleria reached the city gates. They bowed and explained the terms of their surrender. They would give them this sculpture and withdraw from the planet immediately, leaving it alone, in return for Tenn.

The guards talked amongst themselves, tapping the wood and remarking how skillfully crafted it was. Surely this was no trick. The wood was thick enough that they couldn't hear the hollow echo inside.

"We're here," Zim said in an undertone to the nine irkens with him.

"About time," Tak muttered. "What time is it?"

"Three hours to sundown," Zee said from somewhere nearby.

"What's happening?" Skoodge wondered. They could barely hear what was happening outside.

Zim knelt down and put his antennae against the panel they had entered through. He could barely make out what they were saying. "They're talking to the guards. They seem to be buying it. And… yes… Yes, they'll give Tenn back!"

They quietly high-fived.

"Now we're waiting for them to bring Tenn."

After several minutes, Tenn was finally led to the group.

"What're you guys surrendering for?" she hissed.

"We're outnumbered here, Tenn," Skutch replied, putting a comforting hand on her shoulder. She flinched; she was covered in injuries. "We have to withdraw."

"Did the Tallest approve this?" she asked bitterly, but she let him lead her away, arm around her.

"Yes, it was their order."

"What's the bird for?"

"It's a peace offering."

"Oh."

"They're leaving with Tenn," Zim reported. There was a jolt and the Trojan Sleria rolled forward. He could hear awed exclamations from all that it passed. "They really like it." He held his hand out to Tak for a high-five. In good spirits because of the plan working so far, she slapped it.

The movement stopped and there was brief silence, then an eruption of cheering.

"They made the announcement that Irk has surrendered," Zim said, grinning.

"Oh, they won't know what hit them," Tak laughed.

"They're going to celebrate," Zim said. "Just like I predicted they would. They're going to have feasts and dance, and… wow, sounds like they're going to have a good time."

"I wish I could join them," Skoodge said longingly.

"Don't worry, we'll have our own victory party when we defeat them," Zim assured him. "Well, I suppose now the only thing we can do is wait until nightfall."


	5. Victory

Chapter 5

They waited until it was quiet outside, then Zim slowly opened the panel and looked out. The city was quiet. The lights were out in all the buildings. Unlike on Earth, there was no trash left over from their celebrations, but he could tell they had quite a time.

He silently fell to the ground and looked around suspiciously, but saw no one. He backed away to look up at the wooden structure and saw that it had been painted beautifully.

After making sure it was completely clear, he called, "Come on out."

Everyone dropped down to the ground, looking around carefully, making sure their guns were charged and ready to fire.

They snuck through the city, shutting down any defenses they came across, constantly on the lookout for any guards. But they saw no one.

"Those Meekrobs are way too trusting," Tak commented.

"Yes, the fools," Zim replied. They reached the gates to the city. Half of their group slipped into the guardhouse to take out anyone inside and open the gates. He took out his communicator. "My Tallest, the capital is defenseless and the gates are open. Send in the soldiers."

"Good job, Zim," Red replied, and for once, he sounded like it didn't cause him pain to say that. He was surprised at how Zim has proven himself during his time on Meekrob and was starting to feel sorry for doubting him. "They'll be there in a few minutes."

They waited, expecting to be ambushed at any moment. But the city remained quiet.

"Meekrobs spend most of their time sleeping," Tak said. "They need a lot of energy to maintain their levitation and shape-shifting abilities."

"And if they've been partying, they probably are pretty tired," Zim realized.

Tak nodded. "Exactly."

A good distance away, they saw nine figures approaching.

They hurried out to meet them.

"Is Tenn okay?" Tak asked.

"She's fine," Skutch replied. "They're fixing her up now. Once she's healed, she'll be joining us in battle."

"Good. Have you seen the other soldiers?"

"They're coming in behind us."

Sure enough, an entire fleet large enough to cover the night sky soon swooped in, landing nearby. Soon, hundreds of tall, well-armed, and well-trained soldiers marched toward them.

"Where is the one called Zim?" the tallest one, obviously the general, asked.

"I am Zim!" Zim shouted, standing up straight and saluting him.

"Excellent plan, soldier." The general patted his shoulder. "So the city is defenseless?"

"Quite defenseless, sir!"

"Good." The general looked over his shoulder at his platoon and raised his weapon in the air. "Now, this is it. We take this city- we will take the world. Meekrob will be ours. Now let's go!"

They charged through the city, breaking into buildings and killing without mercy, destroying many of them before moving on to the next.

By the time they reached the Meekrobian Leader's mansion, they had left behind a huge line of destruction. Flames flickered in the night. Many soldiers broke off to lay waste to the other side of the city.

"We'll handle this," the general from earlier said to Zim. "You get your troops out of here."

"Are you sure? I can help you threaten the leader…"

"I'm sure. Get out of here. You and your troops have done enough. We can finish up matters here."

"Very well." Zim saluted and said into his communicator, "Zim's team, we're pulling out. We've done all we need to do here. Time to return to the Massive. Repeat: return to the Massive."

The eighteen still left under his command cheered and joined him as he walked through the streets, toward the gates.

A few surviving Meekrob, the civilians that had avoided detection, shrank away as they passed, sheltering their loved ones and ushering them back into their homes. Zim and the others shot in their general direction every so often, but purposely missed each time. They've made their point. They didn't need any more mess to clean up.

By the time they were making their way to their cruisers, all nineteen were together talking and laughing, enjoying their victory. They talked continuously as they flew back to the Massive and got out to cheering from fellow irkens. They met with the Tallest and accepted their congratulations.

They joined them in the Massive's huge dining hall for a celebration. News constantly streamed in. The leader of the Meekrob has given up power. The city was officially irken property. Other major cities across the globe were being attacked and rebellions subdued.

The other soldiers eventually joined the celebration, packing the hall. They ate and drank, talking cheerfully. After a while, even Tenn joined them. She had a few bruises and bandages, but other than that, she looked great. She took a seat next to Zim and thanked him for coming up with the plan that saved her and won the planet for Irk.

All this praise was unfamiliar to the small irken, but he drank it in eagerly, enjoying the attention. He talked to everyone at least once, but spent most of his time talking to the Tallest, since they actually wanted to talk to him now.

The celebration went on for hours. It wasn't very often irkens drank alcohol, but since this was one of their biggest victories in Operation Impending Doom II, they treated themselves. The Tallest tried to have more dignity than everyone else, but even they were tipsy after a few drinks. Soon enough, they were dancing with each other, much to the amusement of everyone else.

Zim, having had a few drinks himself and being affected much more because of how small he was, dragged Tak out into the middle of the hall to dance with her. She was in too good a mood from the victory and alcohol to fight, and followed him willingly.

Skoodge nervously asked Tenn to dance, and to his surprise, she kissed him on the forehead and led him out to where the others were, praising him for being brave enough to go into the Meekrob city in that Trojan Sleria.

Blushing, the pudgy Invader accepted her praise and started dancing with her.

With mutters of, "What the hell" and "It is a party, after all" the others eventually joined the dancing too.

Zim paused in his dancing to take another glass of alcohol from Bob and down it in one gulp. He giggled and threw it aside, not caring what it hit, and nuzzled against Tak.

"Ah, Zim, you're drunk," she said, pushing him back.

"W-well I think you're drunk," he replied, too intoxicated to come up with a better comeback.

"I think you should sit down," she said, steering him toward a chair and sitting him down on it. She sat next to him, watching him carefully in case he did something stupid.

"You don't want to dance anymore? That's fine, I was getting tired," he said, words slurring together slightly. "Heh, look at the Tallest, they're pretty good." He pointed to the pair, who was still dancing. Red was clasping Purple's hand and spinning him around.

"Yeah, I guess they are." Tak noticed Zim reaching for another drink and quickly grabbed it, putting it out of his reach and giving him a soda instead.

He looked at it, shrugged, and drank it. "So what're we gonna do with Meekrob?" he asked.

"We're probably going to use the planet's resources and its people to build us advanced weapons and ships. It's also placed in a very strategic location, so we'll have several military bases there as well."

"Sounds like a good idea. And I know a thing or two about good ideas." Zim grinned at her and finished the soda, throwing it in the general direction of the garbage can and missing.

"I think I'm going to go talk to Zee. You stay here and don't drink any more alcohol," Tak ordered, getting up and walking away.

"Don't tell Zim what to do!" Zim shouted. After a second, he frowned. "Wait, who was I yelling at? Ah, whatever, can't be that important." He watched the Tallest as they stopped dancing, looking mildly embarrassed, and took a seat nearby to rest.

He got up and went over to sit next to them.

"Hello, my Tallest," he said respectfully.

"Oh, hey Zim," Red replied.

Purple examined Zim. "Um, are you drunk?"

"Of course not!" Zim shouted a little louder than necessary. The Tallest flinched and covered their antennae, giving him annoyed looks. Zim quickly apologized in a low whisper. "Sorry, my Tallest."

"It doesn't look like this is going to be winding down any time soon," Red commented, looking around at everyone. They were still talking, drinking, dancing, and generally having a good time.

"Well it is our biggest victory in several years," Purple pointed out.

"And don't forget who's responsible," Zim reminded them.

"Yes Zim, you've told us that a hundred times already," Red sighed.

"So when are you going back to Earth?" Purple asked.

Zim shrugged. "I don't know."

"You should probably go now, before everyone else starts leaving. We're probably going to call an end to the celebration anyway. We don't want to have hangovers tomorrow," Red said.

Zim nodded and stood up, stumbling slightly.

"Are you okay to drive?" Purple asked, not really concerned for Zim all that much but for anything he might hit.

"Of course I am!" Zim replied, flicking his wrist.

"Use the autopilot."

"But-"

"ZIM."

"Okay, fine. I'll call you once I'm back on Earth, my Tallest." Zim bowed and went to tell the others he was leaving.

"All right, see you later," Skoodge said.

"Aw, leaving already?" Tenn asked. "I haven't even gotten to dance with you."

"Eh? Well, all right…" Zim took her hand and danced with her for a while. It was strange being this close to another and talking as though they've been friends forever, but he liked it. She thanked him again as she pulled away. He took her hand and kissed the back of it, smiling. "I'll see you later, Tenn."

"See you."

Zim found Tak leaning against the wall looking bored. "I'm leaving to go back to Earth."

She nodded. "Okay. Be careful. Oh, and tell Dib that I said hi."

"Very well. See you later, Tak. You were an excellent soldier." He held his hand out to her.

She shook it, smiling a little. "So were you, Shorty."

He patted her on the shoulder and continued walking, going back to the hanger and climbing into his ship. He set the coordinates for Earth and was soon leaving the Massive behind. He let the autopilot go at its own pace and leaned back in the seat, closing his eyes. Before he knew it, he was deep asleep.

An alarm roused Zim from his sleep.

He jolted awake, clutching his head and groaning, and looked around for the source of the noise. Seeing that the control panel was blinking red, he tapped it. It showed a warning in large letters. "Warning? What's wrong?" he asked, still a little disoriented from the earlier celebration.

"Black hole ahead," the computer responded.

Zim stared at it. "There aren't any black holes in this section of space. There's just a supergiant sta- ohh." He slapped his hand to his forehead. "It must have gone supernova and collapsed in on itself since the last time I passed it! Now what am I going to do?"

Anyone going through this area knew the quickest way was to pass next to the star, since most ships can easily fight its gravitational field. Several hundred miles to the left was a small moon filled with tunnels, inhabited by a single worm-like beast that lunged out at passing objects and swallowed them whole. If they passed right next to the star, however, it wouldn't be able to see them and therefore couldn't eat them.

"I'll have to go the long way," Zim said, turning off the autopilot and taking the controls. Giving the black hole a wide berth, he flew around its right side, relying on his ship's computer to tell him exactly where it was, since he couldn't actually see it. The cruiser shuddered slightly as he passed near its static limit, the very edge of its powerful gravitational pull.

It was hard fighting its power, but eventually, he made it safely past it and was able to continue on his way.

"I hope everyone else knows that thing is there," he commented, looking back at it as passing meteor was yanked into its depths and disappeared.

He shook his head and looked ahead again. Hopefully the rest of the trip would pass without any more trouble.


	6. Lucida's Planet

Lucida's Planet

Zim was just about to enter hyperspace when a nearby planet caught his attention. "Hmm? Computer, what planet is that?"

"No planet detected."

"What? But it's right there!" Zim pointed.

"…No planet detected."

Frowning, Zim veered off from his course and flew closer to the planet, looking at it carefully. "Is anything showing up on your sensors?"

"No nearby objects detected."

With a frustrated huff, Zim piloted the cruiser just above the planet's thermosphere, looking down on it. It was much smaller than Earth. It was a smooth, creamy purple color, with swirling pink clouds. The oceans were light purple-blue. "Well, I'm staring at it right now, so either it's an illusion or your scanners are defective."

"Why don't you land on it and find out?" The ship's computer was just as much of a smart aleck as the one in his base.

"Fine, I will!" Curiosity getting the best of him, Zim flew down through the atmosphere and landed on the surface. He got out and took a breath of air. It was thick and carried a pleasant flowery smell, but breathable. The grass under his boots was lush and purple. "Hmm. Why didn't this place show up on the sensors?" he asked himself, disguising his cruiser and walking around.

The trees here were tall, with pastel colors and small leaves that waved serenely in the light breeze. It was warm here. When he leaned down and took off his glove to cautiously touch the water in a stream, it didn't burn him, instead flowing coolly around his hand, inviting him to scoop some up and take a drink.

He did. It was the cleanest, most delicious water he's ever tried. He started to take another drink when a large animal leapt out of the nearby trees. He instinctively extended his PAK legs to defend himself, but it didn't concern itself with him, prancing by and lowering its head to drink. It looked like an Earth deer, except it had very long ears and no antlers. Its fur was short and bright blue. When it turned to look at him, he saw that it had deep indigo eyes.

He slowly retracted his PAK legs and took a step toward it. It stood there watching him. He reached a hand out to it. It pushed its head into his hand and he petted it, surprised that anything so large could be so gentle and tame.

It pulled back and uttered a short cry.

Three smaller animals just like it, except spotted with darker blue, stumbled out of the woods after it.

Zim realized that it was a mother with her children. He couldn't help smiling as they surrounded him, nipping curiously at his clothes. Usually animals annoy the crap out of him… but he liked these ones. They were so friendly and cute.

Wondering if the mother would let him, he knelt down and petted one of the offspring. It put its hooves on his knees and looked up at him, eyes twinkling as it took in his strange appearance.

"I don't know what you are or where this planet came from, but I think I can keep it as my little secret," Zim said to it, standing up all the way. The young creature dropped back down to all fours and ambled past him to the creek, taking a drink. Its siblings soon followed.

Wondering what else this strange planet had in store, he continued exploring, leaving the family behind. Everything he met was tame. A bird flew down to sit on his shoulder for some of the trip, doing nothing except offering its company, and flew away just as quickly as it had appeared.

Long snakes occasionally coiled around his feet and hissed lightly only to disappear into the tall grass once more.

It was like every definition of a paradise here. He tried some fruit from a tree and found it delicious. A six-legged animal with sharp teeth offered him a hunk of meat at one point, and though he doesn't trust meat ever since his Earth encounters, he tried it anyway and loved it. Satisfied, the animal had left and continued hunting.

He didn't manage to find any sentient life, though. There were no buildings. Nothing unnatural tainted the land. It was all untouched.

Deciding he had spent too long here, he made his way back to his cruiser. When he reached it, he was surprised to see a blue-skinned, two-legged creature kneeling next to where it was hidden, leaning against it despite it being invisible. It was obviously female, with long purple hair flowing past her shoulders. She wore simple flowing robes of light purple. One of the six-legged meat eaters was lying in her lap licking its front right paw off. Birds sat on each shoulder and a snake was draped around her neck, asleep.

She was eating what looked like a bread roll, unaware of Zim's approach. From his angle, he couldn't see her face.

"Excuse me," he said.

She looked up at him and he froze, stunned by her beauty. She had large eyes that twinkled in the exact shade of emeralds. Her features were flawless and gentle, a small smile on her face. He could see now that she had ears; they perked up out of her hair, long and rounded like a deer's and covered with light blue fuzz. "Oh, hello," she said in perfect irken. Her voice was like honey, sweet and attractive, almost musical. "Would you please sit next to me?"

He couldn't resist; her voice was like a spell. He sat next to her and the snake opened its eyes and examined him before moving to wrap around his neck and rest its head on his shoulder.

"So you are the owner of this strange object I cannot see," she said, reaching back to tap the cruiser.

"Um, yeah, it's invisible," he replied.

"It's not very often I get visitors," she said sadly. "But many come as you do. They leave behind invisible creations and I always run into them, so I sit and wait for them to return, as they always do. I have learned many different languages from talking with them."

"Have you ever met an irken before?" Zim asked, wondering how she could speak his language so well otherwise.

She nodded. "Once. But he could not stay with me. He soon left and I never saw him again." She sighed. "None of my visitors ever stay." She looked at him hopefully. "It's been a long time since I've had the company of an alien. Usually it's just me and my pets. Would you stay with me?"

He wanted to say he had a planet to conquer, but she looked so sad he couldn't say it. "Yes, I can stay for a while."

She smiled. "Thank you. I am Lucida, the goddess of this land."

"What is this place called?" Zim asked. "It didn't show up on my sensors. I was able to see it, but my ship had no idea it was here."

Her smile grew wider. "You are not the first to say that. I don't know why your alien devices can never detect my home, but it has no name. It doesn't need one."

"I see. That's very strange."

She took his hand. "What is your name, irken?"

"Zim," Zim replied.

"That's a very unique name."

"Thank you."

"Would you show me your vessel, Zim?"

Zim hesitated; usually he tries to keep his cruiser disguised from aliens. But she was the only one here and she didn't seem to have the ability to go into space and tell others all about it. He nodded and said, "Voot, disguise off."

It flickered and the cloak disappeared, revealing the small purple ship.

Lucida touched the engine pods curiously, testing the smooth metal, and walked around it. "It's always interesting seeing what other races are capable of. Alas, I do not possess the knowledge of how to create one of these."

"Aren't there other sentient beings here that could help you?" Zim asked.

She shook her head. "I am the only one here. I rule over this land and keep peace alone. This is why it's always nice to have companionship." She returned to him and knelt down in front of him to put their eyes level. "Do you also enjoy companionship, Zim?"

He went still as she touched his cheeks with her hands. They had five fingers each, like a human's. They were thin and delicate, the skin soft and warm. "Well, I'm an Invader, and Invaders need no one," he said nervously, but he made no move to pull away. "But… I suppose… it'd be nice to be with you for a while…"

She leaned too close to his face for comfort. He could feel her breath tickling his mouth. "Thank you," she said softly before kissing him.

His eyes jolted open in surprise. His first instinct was to shove her away, but he was finding it hard to move. His legs trembled and his hands clenched. Then he gave in and kissed back, putting his hands on her narrow waist.

After several moments, Lucida pulled away and stood up, touching his shoulder gently. "Come with me, Zim. Let me show you where I live."

Still dazed from the kiss, he could only nod and follow her. He thought briefly of Earth, but figured he'd go back to it eventually. After all, it wasn't like he was going to stay here forever.

"Lucida?" Zim asked, approaching the alien as she tended to her garden.

"Yes?" she replied, looking up at him and beaming.

"I really must go," he said.

Over the past few weeks, he's been thinking a lot about Earth and realized he missed it. He missed GIR. He missed his base. And though he'd never admit it… he missed Dib.

"What? But it seems that you have barely gotten here." She smiled pleasantly at him.

"I'm sorry, but I have a mission. I can't stay here. Who knows what could have happened in my absence."

She sighed sadly. "Oh, it seems I am cursed to never find a companion… every time one comes to me, he must leave again…"

"I can visit you," Zim said.

"They all say that, but they can never seem to find me again," she replied.

"I would stay if I could… but I've been here for too long already."

She looked down at her flowers. "Okay, if you must… but I'd like you to try this before you go." She pulled one up and offered it to him. It had delicate lilac petals surrounding a pink center. The aroma coming from it was intoxicating and Zim couldn't help leaning in to sniff it.

"Mmm… smells good," he said.

"Eat it."

"Eat it? Is it edible?"

"It's one of my favorites." She gave him a small smile.

"Well… all right." He took the flower carefully and plucked one of the petals off, dropping it in his mouth. It melted like a soft peppermint, seeming to fill him with warmth and happiness. "It's delicious!" He quickly ate the rest, and by the time he was done, he had forgotten why he came to her in the first place. "Do you have more?"

"Of course." Looking victorious, she gave him another flower.

"Mmm…" He inhaled its scent deeply before taking a bite out of it. His thoughts of Earth completely disappeared. He almost forgot who he was. That didn't matter. As long as he got to stay here and enjoy these strange, amazing flowers, he'd be happy.


	7. Five Years Later

Five Years Later

The door to the classroom opened and Dib instantly looked, starting to stand up… then Zita raced in and took her seat. Dib bit his lip and sat down again, staring at his desk and trying not to cry.

It's been five years since Zim left. He said he'd be back in a month at most… but months had turned into years… and he was still gone.

Dib never knew how much he would miss the irken until he was gone. He missed fighting with him. He missed arguing with him during class and throwing pencils and erasers at him. He missed chasing him down the street and to his base, trying to catch him out of disguise and expose him to the world. He missed… all of it.

He told himself that Zim would come back. He had promised him. And there's no way he could have died. He was unkillable. He was a survivor. And conquering Earth was his mission. Nothing would stand in the way of that.

Dib sighed and leaned back in his chair, watching the clock instead of the teacher. Each second seemed to tick by excruciatingly slow.

He was in tenth grade by now and had grown a lot over the years. Reaching about six feet tall, he was almost as tall as his father. His hair scythe had gotten longer, looking more like a jagged bolt of lightning.

He still tended to wear dark clothing. His trench coat was knee-length and his shirt was dark blue with a frowning face on it. He still wore black pants. His boots reached about halfway up his calves and had heavy steel toes; he needed them to protect himself from bullies. As a rather lanky teen, the others saw him as a 'threat to manliness' and often tried to beat him up. In that case, he would punch and kick until they left him alone.

His thoughts stayed on Zim throughout class, like they always do. He remembered the last time he saw him clearly. Saying goodbye, Zim's promise to return, and the kiss.

Years later, Dib did not regret it. He thought it was fitting that that be the last touch he offered his enemy.

He might have thought he just made Zim up, but at least once a day he passed the glowing green house and was reminded that he was real. He had lived there. They've ran through those streets countless times.

He visited sometimes to spend time with GIR. By now, GIR was just as upset as Dib, constantly begging him to bring his master back. He constantly reassured him that he would be back, but he was starting to doubt it himself. He felt so betrayed. Zim had promised… and he thought Zim was too proud to break a promise, even if it was to his enemy.

"Dib, I asked you a question," the teacher snapped.

Dib looked up. "What?"

"What are the possible zeroes of this equation?" she asked, pointing to the board.

Dib pushed his glasses further up his nose and glanced at it before resting his head against his hand. "Three or one negatives and two positives," he replied, sighing with boredom and looking away.

She seemed taken aback. "Um, yes. That's right." She turned to show the steps of the problem while everyone laughed.

Dib slumped down again, chin resting on his desk. Sometimes he just felt like dropping out. Thanks to his father, he was much smarter than these idiots. He didn't need to finish high school. But he came here anyway. His father would never let him hear the end of it if he quit.

He took out a piece of paper and hid it behind his pre-calculus book so he could doodle, not interested in the lecture. As the picture started to look like Zim, he stared at it before squeezing his eyes shut and balling it up, shoving it into his backpack and feeling even worse than before.

Finally, the bell rang for them to go to their next class.

Dib barely remembered to write down the homework assignment before putting his stuff away and slinging his backpack on, walking numbly from the room.

"Dib!" a voice called from down the hall.

Dib stopped and sighed. "What?"

The school counselor ran up to him and put a hand on his shoulder. "How are you doing today, Dib?"

"Fine," Dib replied stiffly.

After seeing how depressed Dib had gotten since Zim's leaving, Professor Membrane had ordered he see the counselor every so often. He had forgotten that this was one of the days he was supposed to.

"Let's go to my office," the man said.

Dib shrugged and followed him. It was better than going to English class.

Once they were sitting in the spacious office, Dib automatically flopping down in the large armchair in front of the desk, the counselor said, "Come on Dib, it's been five years. Give up on him."

"You don't get it, Mr. Harris. I can't."

"Why can't you?"

Dib put his hand over his face. It was always this same question. "You wouldn't understand. He was everything to me. He was the proof that I wasn't crazy. I didn't care that no one else believed me; I knew the truth and it was enough. But now he's gone, and if it weren't for certain traces of his being here… well, I'd think it was all just a dream."

"What 'traces' do you mean?"

"His house, for one. And his servant. And this." Dib pushed the sleeve of his trench coat back and displayed a long scar running up his bicep. Zim had given it to him a long time ago, using a spiderleg to gouge into his arm. It had taken forever to heal, but the scar would always be there.

"Well, there's no doubt that he was real… but you say you don't know where he went?"

Dib sighed and said, "No, he told me before he left."

Mr. Harris seemed surprised by this. Up until now, Dib has said he didn't know why Zim left.

But Dib just couldn't keep from telling the truth now. "Yeah, he told me! He came to my house at night and told me that he would be leaving for a month at most so he could go rescue another irken Invader. He said he'd be back! He promised me! But… but he's still gone!"

"Irken?"

"He's an alien. He was going to fight in a war to rescue another of his species."

"…Right. Okay, let's pretend for a moment he is an alien."

Dib rolled his eyes; no one ever believed him.

"Why would he promise you anything? You two always hated each other."

"I don't know. I just made him promise and he did. And… And I just can't help missing him. We may be enemies, but I wouldn't say we hated each other." He laughed slightly. "Under different circumstances, we might have been friends. We're more alike than we'd ever admit to each other. Both of us are rejects, pushed aside by our society, hated… and yet we do whatever we can for the people that don't care about us. I've only recently realized all this… but it just makes the pain of him being away even worse."

"Hmm, interesting." Mr. Harris wrote some notes down. "Did he say anything else before he left?"

Dib shook his head.

"Did you give him anything in parting?"

Dib stumbled over his reply, trying not blush as he remembered the way he had given the irken a kiss before letting him go. "N-nothing."

It was no good hiding it. The man was a counselor. He was incredibly perceptive. "Dib, there's something you're not telling me."

"No, really, I just said good-bye and he left. Nothing else."

"What happens in the office stays in the office. I won't tell anyone. It'll just be between us."

Even now, five years later, the moment was crystal clear and he could still remember it had felt kissing the irken, the feel of his mouth, his breath… "…I gave him a kiss to remember me by."

"A kiss?"

"Y-yes sir."

"Where?"

Dib stared at a motivational poster on the wall to avoid looking at the counselor's face. "On the lips."

The sound of a pencil scratching against paper was the only sound for a while, and then Mr. Harris said, "Did you love Zim?"

"What? Of course not!" Dib sat up and gave him an indignant look. "He's an alien bent on world destruction! Even if I liked his company, I could never love him! That kiss wasn't a romantic thing. It was just… I don't know why I did it. It just… the moment felt right." He sighed and leaned back in the chair. "I don't hate him," he repeated. "But I don't love him. I just… like him."

"And even if he is going to 'doom the human race' or whatever, you still want him back?"

"Yes. I feel like I have no purpose without being able to chase him around."

"Are you sure he's still alive?"

"Of course he is! Nothing ever manages to kill him! I don't know how many times his base has exploded or any experiment backfired! Yet he always gets up, wipes dirt off of himself, and gets right back to work." Dib shook his head. "I've never seen anyone like him. But he's a survivor. Wherever he is right now, he's alive. I'm sure of it."

"Hmm." Mr. Harris looked up at the clock. "Well, we have twenty minutes left here. Do you have any more to say or do you want to go back to second period until lunch?"

Dib shrugged. "I don't care. Do you have anything to ask?"

"Yes, I do." Mr. Harris put his notes aside and leaned forward, crossing his arms over his desk. "That night he left. Did he seem like he would miss you as well?"

Dib thought about it. "He seemed pretty emotionless about it. He was surprised and confused when I made him promise to come back and I couldn't really explain myself to him. But when I kissed him…" He looked away to hide his small blush, "He actually kissed back."

"I see. Well, it seems to me like he does care about you enough to promise he'll return… perhaps he ran into trouble."

"Well, he does have a knack for getting into trouble, but I can't imagine what trouble would cause him to be away for years."

"I can't either. I'm sure he'll show up, though. If not, then it might just be time to move on and forget about him."

_But I don't want to forget about him,_ Dib wanted to say, but he just shrugged and leaned down to pick up his backpack. "Okay. Anything else?"

"No, but I think we made a lot of progress today. See you next week."

"Yeah, see you." Dib put his backpack on and left the office. Instead of finishing the last ten minutes of English, he just walked right past it and into the cafeteria to get his lunch before everyone else got there.

He picked at his lunch, thinking about what he had said earlier. He highly doubted that the counselor believed the 'Zim is an alien' part, but at least he had played along and didn't call him crazy. He was sympathetic toward him.

Slowly, other students began to stream in. They ignored him, taking seats anywhere but at his table. The only student who sat next to him was his sister, but she soon took out her GameSlave and became immersed in its digital world.

"Gaz, do you think Zim's all right wherever he is?" Dib asked.

She sighed and spared him a glance. "He's been gone for five years, Dib. He's probably dead."

"No, don't say that! Zim isn't dead! Nothing ever kills him!"

"Well what do you think happened, then?"

"I don't know. But he has to still be alive. He promised that he'd come back. Maybe something happened to delay him… but he's out there somewhere. And I'll wait for him."

"Why do you care so much? Wasn't it always your dream to get rid of him and 'save mankind?' And now that he's actually gone, you miss him? What's wrong with you?"

"…You wouldn't understand." Dib turned away from her stubbornly, taking a drink of milk.

She raised an eyebrow, and then just shrugged. "Whatever. Go on being depressed. I don't really care."

"Of course you don't. No one ever cares."

Gaz groaned and turned her game off, putting it in her pocket, and forced herself to give him a hug. She didn't like it, but she also didn't want to see him moping around all day. "I do care. But you shouldn't let this ruin your life. Let him go."

Surprised to find his sister hugging him, he stared at her for several moments before finally raising his arms to hug back. "I don't want to let him go… I'm still going to hope for him to return."

She sighed and pushed him back. "Whatever. But I don't think he's coming back."

Dib let his arms drop and looked glumly at his barely touched food. "Where are you, Zim?" he whispered.


	8. Escape

Chapter 8

Lucida searched desperately in her garden for more loti flowers, but all that were left were sprouts.

Arms linked around her from behind. "Need help finding something, Lucy?"

She relaxed at the sound of the irken's voice. He's been with her for years now; the flowers worked to create a sense of content and amnesia. He couldn't remember anything except her. He forgot his own name half the time. He couldn't remember all his training that told him he needed no one and he was supposed to be a fierce soldier, so often gave her hugs and other affection. She has enjoyed his company immensely and didn't want to let him go. "Help me find some more of those loti flowers you like, Zim."

He let go of her and knelt next to her, searching alongside her, humming quietly and eyes half-lidded. He carefully pushed delicate flowers aside as he searched. "I can't find any."

"Well… here, try this." She plucked one of the sprouts out and offered it to him.

He accepted it without question and ate it. He considered it for a few moments. "It's not as good as the fully grown flowers."

She doubled her effort. If she let the spell of the flowers wear off and he realized she's kept him here for years, there was no doubt he'd be furious. Irkens are very vengeful creatures.

Soon, an hour passed and Zim was slowly starting to remember things other than this planet and the alien goddess. He had flashes of fighting on Meekrob. He closed his eyes and reeled back, trying to fight them off, not liking how the violence was disturbing his peace of mind.

His PAK forced the memories onto him though. He suddenly remembered his name. He was Zim. Irken Invader Zim. He was assigned to a planet called Earth. His robot servant GIR was guarding his base while he was away…

He remembered that Earth boy Dib making him promise to come back. He remembered the boy approaching him, almost sadly, and kissing him gently.

All of this was fuzzy at first, but it slowly grew stronger.

"Zim?" Lucida shook him, trying to pull him to his feet.

Zim jolted up.

She frantically held a sprout of loti flower to him, but he smacked it aside. He remembered his first meeting with her, staying with her for a few weeks, and then her giving him his first flower… How long ago was that? The time between then and now was a blur. A peaceful blur, but a blur nonetheless. "How long have I been here?" he demanded.

"F-five years," Lucida stuttered, backing away.

"WHAT?" He grabbed the front of her robe and shook her angrily. "HOW? WHY?"

"The flowers I gave you, they can enchant any being into wanting to stay here forever. That's why I made sure you had at least one a day… but they ran out and you… you recovered." She stared at him fearfully.

"Why would you do that? Keeping me here against my will?"

"I didn't want to lose you! I liked having you here with me! You don't understand! You would have left just like all the other men, leaving me alone, until someone else comes along and then rips my heart out yet again!"

"That didn't give you any right to keep me here!" Zim put his face real close to hers and growled at her. "If you weren't a female, I'd kill you right now." He flung her aside and raced away.

"Zim, wait!" she yelled after him, holding out a hand. But when he disappeared into the woods, moving too fast for her to ever catch him, she simply sat back on her knees and lowered her head, lamenting her loss.

Zim didn't stop moving until he found his cruiser and was jumping in. "Take me back to Earth!" he shouted.

He couldn't believe he had stayed here for five years. Was Earth even there anymore? Did some other alien race come along and conquer it; or try to steal it like the Planet Jackers had? Did GIR destroy the base or Dib expose it?

"Dib," he realized as the ship lifted off and shot into space. "I had promised him I would be back in about a month… I broke that promise! Gah!" He slammed his head against the console. He always kept his promises; even to enemies.

He wondered if Dib had forgotten about him. Or if he remembered him, did he hate him now? Before, they hadn't liked each other… but Dib definitely didn't hate him. He actually seemed to respect him. After this, though… there was no telling how the boy would feel toward him.

"Asteroid field ahead," the computer reported.

Zim looked up and saw nothing but asteroids ahead, whizzing back and forth dangerously fast. He narrowed his eyes and took the controls. It took precise timing, but he managed to weave through them, only losing an auxiliary engine in the process. But that could easily be fixed.

Once he was safe again, he made the jump into hyperspace.

A few seconds later, the ship exited and he saw the blue and green planet rising in front of him. He smiled and flew down through the atmosphere, finding his base. It was intact. He piloted the cruiser inside and got out, looking around. Nothing in the hanger was broken.

He went down into the main level and saw the kitchen surprisingly clean. There was evidence that it's been used, but wasn't just left as a mess. The living room was clean too.

Seeing GIR sitting on the couch watching TV with a sad expression, he instantly felt terrible. "GIR!" he called.

GIR turned to look at him and then stared. "Master? Is that you?"

Zim nodded and walked over to him. "Yes, it's me."

They watched each other for several moments before GIR burst into tears and hugged him tightly, crying against his shoulder. "I missed you so much, Master! Why were you gone so long?"

"I'm sorry. I tried to come home, but I was trapped on this strange planet for years… I only managed to get away earlier…"

"I missed you!"

"I'm back now, so please stop crying!" Zim didn't push him away, though. He had missed GIR as well.

Slowly, GIR calmed down and pulled back to look at him with tear-filled eyes. "Dibby really missed you too."

"He does?"

GIR nodded. "He kept sayin' ya promised to come back but you never did, and he's really sad now."

"Does he hate me?"

"No, he wanted you to come back. He misses you lots, Master. You should go see him."

Zim sighed and picked up his disguise, shaking dust out of it and putting it on. "I guess I should. A promise is a promise, after all." He left the house and walked slowly to Dib's house, wondering what he should say to him. He couldn't help thinking about what the boy must look like now. Surely he's grown. He'd be about sixteen by now, if he remembered correctly.

He couldn't believe the loti flowers had caused time to pass so quickly. He had no identity during that time. It was all a haze, and he hated himself for taking that first bite that enslaved him. He hated Lucida for doing that to him.

Eventually, he reached Dib's house. He considered going in the front door, then changed his mind and climbed up to his window. He didn't go in right away, instead looking to see if he was even in here.

Sure enough, he was, sitting on the edge of the bed and reading something.

Zim had to cover his mouth to keep from gasping.

Dib was much taller. He had to be about six feet tall standing, and his hair was longer. The usual big head insult wouldn't work anymore; his body had filled out quite nicely relative to it, since teenagers usually do become more proportioned as they get older.

He turned his head slightly, looking at the wall glumly, and Zim was surprised at how sad he looked. His amber eyes were lowered behind the same large glasses, their depths showing nothing but misery.

"He really does miss me…" Zim realized. He pushed the window open.

Dib turned at the sound and stared at him. There was a long, frozen moment of disbelief. Then, slowly, he crawled across the bed and got up on his knees, touching the side of Zim's face with a hand.

"Zim?" he chanced asking, hoping this wasn't a dream. "Is that really you?"

Zim nodded. "Yes, it's me. I told you I'd come back."

Dib watched him for a while longer before suddenly punching him in the side of the face.

"OW! What was that for?" Zim demanded, grabbing his cheek as pain seared in it.

"You jerk!" Suddenly, Dib grabbed him and yanked him into the room, holding him against his chest and crying against his shoulder. "I thought you would never come back! I spent so long waiting for you; I was beginning to think you were gone forever!"

Zim was surprised, to say the least. One second Dib was mad at him; now he was crying and telling him he had missed him. "I would have been back much sooner, but there was a complication!" he shouted.

Dib slowly calmed down and pushed him back. "Why don't you tell me, then?"

"We won the war for Irk. Meekrob was conquered and I began the journey back here. But along the way, I saw a strange planet that didn't show up on the sensors. Curious, and in no hurry to get back to Earth, I stopped to see what it was. While there, I met an alien who claimed to be a goddess and the only sentient being there. There was nothing else but animals and plants. I stayed for a while, since she was just so sad and lonely it would be cruel to leave her; even for me. But then she didn't want me to ever leave. So she tricked me into eating a loti flower…" He sighed, looking to the side. "It had a powerful side affect that made me forget who I was and everything except her and her planet. Suddenly I wanted nothing but to be with her and stay there forever. She made sure I kept eating them, but eventually… she ran out. My memories came back and I quickly came back here."

Dib was silent as he thought about all that.

"I'm sorry it took me so long… it's my fault… I never should have eaten that stupid flower!"

"So if it wasn't for that, you would have come back when you said you would?"

"Of course. Zim always keeps his promises."

"You have no idea how much I missed you."

"How much did you miss me?"

By way of answer, Dib lifted his chin and gently pressed their lips together.

Taken by surprise, Zim could only stare at him for several moments before slowly relaxing and tilting his head, pushing their mouths together more firmly, eyes drifting shut. He raised his arms to put them around his neck.

In the past years, Dib was always able to remember clearly what this had felt like when they said goodbye… now he was enjoying being able to do it again. He knew that after this they would go back to being enemies, never to speak of it… but he wanted to make the moment last.

When they separated, Zim wasn't sure what to say. He's never been so cared about before. "…I missed you too," he said at last.

"Don't ever leave again."

"Don't worry. I won't leave until this planet is conquered and my Tallest come here to do as they want with it."

"And since that'll never happen, I guess you'll have to stay here forever." Dib couldn't help giving him a cuddle; God, he had missed him so much.

The familiar pout coming to his face, Zim replied, "You know I'll beat you, Dib!"

"I'd like to see that."

"I will be your master!"

"You're still as short as you ever were."

"Don't change the subject!"

"I never noticed before, but you're really cute." He kissed the irken again, starting to like it.

Zim jumped back. "I am not cute!" He covered his mouth and looked away.

"Yes you are!" Now that he had a height advantage, Dib easily pulled the irken into his arms and held him tightly. Having matured quite a bit, he found Zim more adorable than threatening. He wasn't really worried about him conquering Earth. He was never able to before.

"Am not," Zim complained, fighting to get away.

Dib held him insistently until he finally gave up.

"Fine, I will allow you to cuddle Zim's mighty self, since you missed me so much. But tomorrow, things go back to normal." Zim crossed his arms, not pleased with being forced into submission like this.

"So you missed me too, huh?" Dib asked.

"What? No, of course not! I never said that!"

"Yeah you did."

"Lies!"

The teenager smiled at the familiar shout and merely hugged Zim tighter.

He may be an evil alien bent on world destruction… but he was _his_ evil alien, and he wasn't going to let him go over again. He finally understood why he had missed him so much. Because every yin needs a yang. There can't be good without evil. They were perfect enemies. And he had a feeling Zim understood that as well, because the irken soon gave in and hugged him possessively, biting at his throat.

"Zim?"

"What?"

"We're perfect enemies for each other, aren't we?"

Zim smiled, prompting Dib to do so too. He did understand. "Of course we are. There isn't a greater pair of enemies anywhere in the known universe!"

"And you'll always be here to fight me, right?"

"Of course!"

"Don't you ever leave me again."

"I won't."

"Good." Dib was quiet for a while, then said, "Before we go back to being enemies, though… can we just spend some time together?"

Zim started to protest, but as he thought about it, he realized that it might be nice to share a friendly moment with his perfect enemy. "Sure. But only for the rest of today." He leaned into his arms and let him hold him. "Tomorrow, we'll resume our epic battle for the fate of Earth."

"But for now… why don't you tell me more about that war against Meekrob?"

"Very well. We were hopelessly outnumbered, but Zim never gave up! I came up with the perfect plan!"

They talked for the rest of the day, eventually forgetting about the past five years as they enjoyed being together once more, talking and teasing, occasionally pushing each other around just for the fun of it.

They had to admit… it was amazing finally being together once more. And they will never let anything tear apart their rivalry ever again.


	9. The Truth

The Truth

The Tallest were surprised when Zim called them. After getting no word from him for years, they had assumed he was dead. When he told them about the planet he had become trapped on, they asked for its coordinates so they could investigate it. He gave it to them and then ended the transmission. After that, he returned to the old experiment he had been working on before leaving for Meekrob. For some reason, though, he just didn't feel like finishing it right now. With a shrug, he abandoned it to go back upstairs and watch TV.

It was strange being back on Earth. The air stunk and everything was ugly compared to Lucida's planet. He didn't miss it, though. Not after she had tried to imprison him there forever. He thought of Dib and smiled. The boy had been so happy to see him again. And he found that he liked getting to see him again as well.

There was something special between them. Not quite hate, not quite love… but something that was both and neither at the same time. Whatever it was, it kept them together. They weren't going to let anything separate them.

On the way to school the next day, Dib chased Zim down the street, calling the familiar insults at him, but laughing more than he did in the old days. And Zim laughed too, enjoying the chase, occasionally throwing back his own insults.

He slowed down a little, letting Dib catch up and tackle him, wrestling with him for several moments before shoving him away and running again, laughing even harder.

In class, they threw pencils and erasers at each other while the teacher wasn't looking. At lunch, they sat at the same table so they could continue mocking each other, occasionally throwing plastic utensils at the other's face.

Yet through it all, they couldn't help noticing certain attracting features of the other. Zim was impressed by how tall Dib had gotten. He liked how much calmer he was now, almost playful instead of angry. It was like he wasn't taking him seriously now. He didn't mind all that much, though.

Dib, meanwhile, couldn't help but notice how cute Zim could be. The irken hadn't grown an inch since he last saw him and he looked perfectly huggable. He didn't see him as much of a threat anymore. The armada hadn't shown up in the last five years; obviously they weren't ever going to and Zim was just a bunch of talk.

"Hey, Zim, are your leaders even interested in Earth anymore?" Dib asked.

Zim pulled his spork back and let it go, flicking a meatball into his face. Then he lowered the utensil and said, "Of course they are."

"Then why haven't they come anywhere near the planet in the past five years?"

Zim deadpanned, unable to think of an excuse. "They… they um…" He looked around, thinking hard but coming up with nothing. "They're dealing with the other planets first. This one's really out of the way, so they'll get to it last."

"Haven't the other Invaders already conquered their planets by now?"

Zim didn't want to admit that almost all of them had. He remembered talking to each of them about their assigned planets and many had successfully conquered them. And that had been five years ago. Surely all of them were irken property now. "Well, yes… I'm sure they're on their way. I'll call them tonight and ensure your doom!"

Dib watched him for a few moments before lunging across the table to embrace him. "You are so cute!"

"Ahh, let go of me, Zim is not cute!" Zim struggled to get away.

"Yeah you are! You're adorable!" Dib let go of him and pinched his cheeks. "With those big bug eyes and cute grin!"

"Do you see me grinning?" Zim smacked his hand away and pouted. "I liked it better when you hated me."

"Are you sure about that? I think you like it when I'm being nice to you."

"Lies."

"Oh, so you'd rather I do… this?" Dib shoved him off of the bench seat.

Zim grabbed wildly for him but missed, grunting in pain when he hit the hard cafeteria floor. He laid there for a moment before jumping back up. "Yes, that's much more Dib-like."

"Whatever. I just don't feel like fighting with you anymore. I know you're not a threat to Earth. If you were, you would have finished it off years ago. Your little armada thing isn't coming. So if I were you, I'd just accept that."

"You're wrong! They will be here!" Zim climbed back into his seat and leaned across the table to give Dib a good smack upside the head.

He flinched slightly but didn't retaliate. "We'll see." He got up and dumped his tray, then left to go to social studies.

Zim glared after him, but got up and followed anyway. After making up an obvious but believed lie about why he was gone so long, he was accepted into the Hi-Skool and he ended up with the same classes as Dib. Not that he minded; more opportunities to make fun of him all day.

He didn't really speak to the human for the rest to the day, too busy thinking about everything he had said. Surely this planet was important, or else he wouldn't have been sent here. He would call his Tallest tonight and ask them when they'll be getting there. Yes, that's exactly what he would do.

"Yes, Zim?" Red asked once the call went through.

"My Tallest, this planet is weak and pathetic. You can come by and take it at any time you want. So… when do you think you'll be here?"

"Well, we've looked at some of the data you sent us," Purple said slowly. "But from what we can tell, that planet really isn't of much use to us. It's very out of the way, so the location has no strategic value. Most of its natural resources have been used up. It's polluted and the water is toxic to us. So… we don't really want it."

Zim stared, unable to believe it. "So you're not coming?"

"Nope," Purple replied.

"You're leaving the planet alone?"

"Yep," Red answered.

"Then what should I do? I have no reason to be here anymore if you don't need the planet."

"Well, we originally sent you there just to get rid of you," Purple explained.

Zim stared. "What?"

"You were banished there originally. We never planned on going near it. You've proved yourself as a soldier, but you're still a defect, and you're just too dangerous and unpredictable to be around the rest of us. So you have to stay there unless we absolutely need you."

Zim's antennae drooped. "Banished? But… but that would mean…" _Dib was right,_ he thought.

"That means you're going to live out your life there on Earth. Far away from us. Sorry Zim, but it's the law."

Zim nodded slowly, wrapping his arms around himself and looking away.

"Take care of yourself. Just because we're banishing you, it doesn't mean we want you to go kill yourself," Purple said.

Zim forced himself to meet their eyes. They didn't look annoyed; it almost looked like they felt sorry for him. "Okay, my Tallest."

"Bye." They ended the transmission.

Sighing sadly, Zim glanced around his base before numbly returning to the elevator and going upstairs. He silently put on his disguise and went to the door.

"Where ya goin?" GIR asked.

"Out. I need some time to think."

"Okay. See ya later."

Zim stepped out and closed the door quietly behind him. He looked up at the bright Earth sun for a few moments before lowering his gaze and walking aimlessly down the sidewalk. He didn't really pay attention to where he was going and had to dodge lamp posts and other objects several different times.

He saw Madness eating a steak ahead, but for once, he didn't scream and run in the other direction. Instead, he just stepped carefully over the creepy Chihuahua and continued walking. Madness looked mildly surprised by this.

The news of his banishment weighed heavily on the irken's heart. He was in too much shock to cry about it, but he knew the misery would come soon. He couldn't believe they could do such a thing to him. After the Meekrob victory, he had expected them to love him. But despite that, he was still banished.

He looked up and found that his feet had carried him to Dib's house. His eyes widened slightly before lowering. "He was right. Should I tell him, though?" He watched the house for several moments before deciding that he had to tell someone. He knocked on the front door.

Gaz opened it. She stared at him for several moments, as though he was someone she's seen before but couldn't quite remember. "Do I… know you?" She was very good at hiding her amusement.

"Let me in, Gaz. I need to talk to Dib," Zim replied. He noted that she was much taller than she was before he left, about a few inches shorter than Dib. Her purple hair reached down to her shoulders and had been straightened out except for three long, spiky bangs.

She considered it before shrugging and moving aside. "He's in his room. Upstairs, to the right."

Zim nodded and walked in, going up the stairs. He knocked on the door to the right. "Dib? Dib, it's me!"

"Zim?" Dib opened it, looking at him in surprise. "What are you doing here?"

"You were right."

"Right about…?" Dib looked confused and then shocked as he realized what Zim was talking about. "The armada isn't coming?"

Zim shook his head. "No, Earth is useless to us."

"So are you going to go somewhere else?"

"No. I was banished here," Zim replied.

"Banished?"

"Yes. That's why they sent me here in the first place. I'm not to return to Irk. Ever." Zim bit his lip, trying not to cry.

Dib could see the tears threatening to well up in the irken's eyes and quickly pulled him into a hug. "I'm sorry."

Usually Zim would shove him away, but his comfort was welcome now. He leaned in closer, resting his chin on Dib's shoulder, sniffing but refusing to cry.

Dib stroked his back as he felt his body shake with sobs. "Let it out. I've got you."

"Irken Invaders don't cry," Zim replied, but nonetheless hugged back and let tears slip from his eyes as he blinked.

"It isn't weak to cry. It shows that you have feelings. There's no shame in that."

"I know…" Zim closed his eyes and allowed the tears to fall freely onto Dib's shoulder.

Dib held him close the entire time, not saying anything. When he felt Zim calm down, he pushed him back and examined him. Then he smiled and wiped the tears away from under his eyes. "You know, you're really cute when you're crying."

Zim couldn't help smiling too. No one has ever been so nice to him. He found that he liked it. He gently set a hand on Dib's cheek, looking into his eyes and finding only sincerity. He held his face still and kissed him.

Dib closed his eyes and pulled the small irken closer, kissing him back, enjoying the intimate feel of it.

When they separated, Zim said, "Thanks."

"No problem."

They held each other for a while longer, neither needing to speak.

"Zim?" Dib said at last.

"Hmm?"

"Now that you're banished, well… do we have to go on being enemies?"

Zim watched him for the longest time, not sure what to say. Sure, they didn't need to be enemies any more, but could he put aside their past rivalry so easily? As he thought about it, he realized that their emotional bond was powerful, and none of it was hate. There was annoyance in their past, and anger… but no actual hate. There was mutual understanding and respect. Perhaps… perhaps they could be more.

"No. I don't want to be your enemy," Zim said at last. "If I'm going to be stuck here, then I don't want us to be enemies. That would just make it even harder to stay here."

"Well then, I'll be happy to be your friend."

"Really?"

Dib nodded.

With a smile, Zim nestled against him and rested his head against his chest, enjoying the feel of Dib's arms around him. "Thank you."

"Maybe I'd like to be more than a friend." Dib kissed the side of Zim's head.

Zim couldn't help purring. "That's fine too."

"After all, who understands us better than each other? And to tell the truth…" Dib hugged him tightly, "I think I'd be pretty jealous of anyone who tries to date you."

"I would be too. If you even tried to get a girlfriend, why, I think I'd have to chase her up a tree so she'll stay away from you."

"I bet you would."

Zim nibbled under his chin. "So in order to keep that from happening… maybe it'd be best if we stay with each other."

"I couldn't agree more."

They lapsed into quiet, occasionally speaking but mostly just enjoying each other's company. Sure, a lot has happened between them and they will always remember past battles, but now they truly understood how much alike they were. And while they had each other, they were content.


End file.
